Dates From Hell

How to win back your ex husband

If you’re like most women who’ve lost their husband through separation or divorce it can be a devastating experience.   If the man initiated the separation – or was the driving force – it can make getting back together a daunting task. Men and women leave a relationship for decidedly different reasons.  Women usually find that their emotional needs are not being met, while men usually leave from monotony or the feeling of being trapped or ‘managed’. ~  Most men will leave a relationship due to monotony or because they feel a woman is too emotionally needy. } So the only way to get your ex back is to show him that you are capable of taking responsibility for certain things in the relationship and changing them accordingly.

If you are an involuntary single and you genuinely want to get him back then start by letting some time go by. It doesn’t matter who precipitated the breakup, you both need some mourning time.

When you feel comfortable, make the first move and contact him. If you left him, he may still feel hurt and injured. It is amazing what such a simple gesture can do. If the situation is reversed and he has left you, it is a matter of simply showing him how hard you are trying to change to benefit the relationship.

After the first contact begin to find ways to see him again. When you feel the time is right, invite him to an outing, perhaps something you used to do together. This will serve in showing him how good the relationship could be at times and will remind him what he is missing out on by not being with you. Spending time with him is also an ideal opportunity to show him how you have changed and how it may benefit a future relationship.  This is the real key to having your ex back.

When the two of you are together, be warm and attentive but keep your distance. Being too clingy or over the top will only serve to scare him away.

Be sure to maintain your physical appearance or, in the event that you let yourself go during the relationship, be sure to improve upon it by improving your fitness and taking pride in your appearance. Nothing will grab his attention more than seeing you looking fit and fabulous.

An improved look on your part will be beneficial both to your plan and your state of mind. Once you have re-entered the relationship, be sure to maintain any changes you have made.

If you don’t feel that you can really make the changes that are necessary for a reuniting of the relationship then you should put if off until you do. If you do not feel that you will be able to sustain these changes, do no start a new relationship with your ex husband as this will only result in further heartache and pain later down the track.

If things go as planned, you might find that the relationship has spontaneously reignited and no showdown conversation is needed.  However, you should still let him know that the new you is genuine. 

This gradual and progressive strategy is the best approach to get ex back.