Tired of Bad Dates? Take a look at this Date From Hell Story!


So I meet this guy on a dating site and exchange a few emails. Decide to meet at a local (for me) restaurant as he is coming from across the city. He has also offered to buy dinner rather than meet for coffee, and although I prefer a shorter date first, I agree because of the distance factor. At first sight, he is DEFINITELY not the height he states and is dressed in a rather geeky fashion. I am an *older* dater, as is he, but two tone patent leather shoes and a polka dot tie???? Clearly he also dyes his moustache as it's about 6 shades darker than his hair. However at least he HAS hair!

And so began one of the loooooongest 1.5 hours of my life. NOW he tells me that he has been married three times and the last was to a 25 year old Thai girl. It didn't work well apparently. REALLY?? Then he starts to elaborate on the shortcomings of his other wives and his life with them, so I try changing the subject to his hobbies. OMG, maybe the wife stories actually ARE more interesting! He then tells me that he studied to be a minister as a young man and dropped out. Indeed I feel like I am hearing a sermon as he tells me about his views on life, the bible and on lying??? {{{{sigh....}}}}.

Dinner has been ordered by now and my mind is fantasizing about ways to escape. He is clearly interested as he keeps reaching over to touch my arm and telling me that "I am the best he has met yet". Oh JOY! Then he drops the BIGGEST bombshell. He is actually TEN years older than he states on his profile and therefore 11 years my senior! After what he has just told me about his views on lying, I ask how he justifies that. His answer was that he wouldn't get a date if he told women his real age. Oh, so that explains it then!! !

I eat and drink as quickly as possible and then offer to pay my part. He refuses, but I know I NEVER want to see this man again, so I gently tell him that I don't believe we are a match and therefore I would feel better about paying my way. He accepts my offer and I leave, trying not to run out the door!

End of story? Well no. I get an email from him the next morning telling me that I am misrepresenting myself in MY PHOTOS on the dating site, that I am MUCH larger in real life and that the photos must be old or I have put on a HUGE amount of weight in a short time. My full length photo is 12 mths old and I have actually dropped a few kilos since then. The two other head shots are just months old.

I ignored the mail although I felt like giving him a huge serve. It has rocked my confidence once again though, even though I know I shouldn't take on HIS opinion of me. Totally disillusioned, as I seem to just get one bad date after another. One of the things about dating in later life is that everyone has a lot of history (baggage) and it seems most guys don't deal with it. I asked him what HE had learned from being married 3 times and "to be more careful" was his answer. I have been married twice myself and I totally see my responsibility and what I contributed to the downfall.

Maybe I AM going to end up as a little old lady with cats!

This date from hell story was submitted by:  Jan from Australia

Dr. Gooddate's response:

Holy crap!   Not only does he bring his exes into the conversation, but he has the audacity to talk about their "shortcomings"???  If he's still rambling on about his exes, perhaps it would be a good idea to learn to leave your ex out of the conversation as we say in our advice section entitled: First Date - Leave your Ex out of it!  A major red flag right from the get go!  And not only does he talk about one ex, but he talks about three.  Certainly something that Mr. Perfect shouldn't be discussing.

To top it off, he's also a liar and most likely the atypical photo fibber since he didn't come clean about is age in his profile.

I must say that at the very least, you got a free meal out of this first date fiasco! 

Trust me when I tell you that if you wanted to see him again, he'd be all over it.  But the fact that you were honest got his dander up....and up just enough to go on the defensive and struggle for control by telling you that you misrepresented yourself - and then he insulted you on top of it all.  Even after he admittedly lied about who he was in his profile.  This dude has a touch of the rotten rejectee in him as well, but I do have to admit that it could have been worse.

HEY!  If you end up a little old lady with cats, it would be a hell of a lot better than ending up as someone's 4th wife and future 4th ex-wife.  Glad you got out early. 

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